


Truth be told

by Romancemesomeziam



Series: Truth [1]
Category: The Last Kingdom (TV)
Genre: F/M, Just One Bed, Multi, Oblivious, Slow Burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-10
Updated: 2020-08-10
Packaged: 2021-03-05 22:55:34
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 8
Words: 12,711
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25813162
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Romancemesomeziam/pseuds/Romancemesomeziam
Summary: All your life you had been brought up as a shield maiden. You craved battle and victory but sometimes part of you wanted more. Fighting would no doubt always be a part of your life but coming home to someone that wanted to cherish you didn't seem all that bad either.
Relationships: Sihtric (The Last Kingdom)/Original Character(s), Sihtric/Finan/Original Character
Series: Truth [1]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1884802
Comments: 10
Kudos: 55





	1. Chapter 1

It was late evening by the time the horses were settled in for the night after being brushed and fed.

The sun had long set, the night projecting shadows across the empty streets as you walked towards the ale house. You could hear rambunctious laughter as you approached, your stomach rumbling.

The warmth of the ale house hit you like a wall as you stepped through the door, unclipping your cloak from around your shoulders. 

You spotted Uthred and the others at a far table. You squeezed through the locals of Coccham to reach them, but your approach was noticed right away. 

"Ah finally, if it isn't my favorite stable girl," laughed Finan as you took a seat next to him.

You glared in his direction, accepting the stew Osferth pushed in your direction. 

"I'm never playing dice with you ever again" you said to Finan as you took a spoonful of the stew. "You fucking cheat."

"I do not," Finan proclaimed, a fake offended look spreading across his face. 

"Oh you do," countered Uthred immediately, slapping Finan's back with a chuckle. Osferth laughed in agreement.

Instantly Finan threw himself into an argument over his dice abilities and Uthred seemed all too pleased to follow, both men smirking all the same. 

You rolled your eyes, content to let them argue while you ate. Osferth seemed to feel the same, offering you a mug of ale. 

You were used to the chaos and banter by now, having traveled and fought with these men for years. It still amused you that they often seemed to act more like children than men after a few drinks. 

After a few minutes the arguing subsided, Finan grumbling in his ale about everyone being rubbish. 

"Any news from Sihtric?" questioned Osferth as if to temper things down. 

The name spread a certain anxiety through your body as you looked up, seeking information but Uthred simply shook his head. 

"He should be back soon. The route I sent him out to scout wasn't that long."

"I should have gone too," you replied but Uthred shot you a look that you knew meant not to argue with him over this. 

Truth was you were still recovering from a recent battle, and although you were a warrior just like them, the men had a tendency to want to protect you. 

In your eyes it was annoying but Uthred being your leader you knew you were limited in how much you could push for work right now. Once you proved you were no longer injured, you knew they would treat you as an equal once more.

The conversation continued easily as you finished your food. Finan seemed distracted by a busty woman at the bar and you were all too tired to deal with what was to come.

"I'm going home," you announced as you stood. "Don't let me find you lot sleeping in the barn again."

"That happened once," Finan exclaimed but you only chuckled as you made your way out. 

You had chores to do in the morning plus Finan's stable duties again since you had lost at dice. All you wanted right now was to bathe and sleep for as long as possible. 

As you exited the ale house you grabbed a nearby torch only to notice someone coming out of the stables. 

"Sihtric?" You called out, feeling your stomach in knots. You had been worried about him as you usually scouted together and his travels had taken much longer than anticipated. 

There was also another part of you that craved more from the warrior but things had always been awkward between the two of you. You were friends yes, but Sihtric was always so reserved in your presence that you couldn't believe he'd have any interest in you. Afterall he spent just as much time as Finan eyeing the women and planning to get his hands on them.

"Y/N," Sihtric replied, feet heavy and dragging through the dirt as he approached you. 

It was evident he was tired, his whole body slumping forward as he walked. 

"You look like shit," you said as you watched him, his dark features coming to light as he finally stopped next to you. He was caked in dirt, no doubt from sleeping in the woods for so long, his face covered in streaks of mud. 

"Yeah," he said with a sigh. "I need to bathe, I know."

You bit your lip in amusement as you saw him shake his head with a grin. You couldn't help but think that he looked handsome even covered in mud. 

"I was heading to the river if you want to join." You said before you could stop yourself, instantly regretting your offer. The last thing you needed right now was to find yourself naked in the river with him. 

"This late?" Sihtric asked as his eyes ran across you. 

You nodded, not trusting your voice. 

For a second he seemed to hesitate as he glanced towards the ale house, no doubt thinking he should report to Uthred first, but in the end he nodded.

You swallowed around nothing, forcing a smile as you turned towards the path that led to the river, your mind rushing with a million thoughts. 

Sihtric followed close behind in silence, his breath over your shoulder the only indication of his presence. 

You made it to the river after a few minutes, both of you exchanging looks as you turned to undress, the torch now planted in the ground near the waterfront.

It wasn't the first time you had bathed with one of the men around but for some reason, this felt different. 

Quickly you threw aside your tunic and trousers before pulling off your boots. The water was cold as you entered it, your body shivering as you plunged in. 

You were trying to focus on your breathing when you finally turned. Sihtric was waist deep into the water, his body on display by the torch's light. You couldn't help but gaze at the shadows licking at his muscular angles, his dark eyes focused on you. 

You couldn't help but keep your eyes on him as he approached, disappearing under the water for a second before he reappeared mere feet away from you. 

You stared at each other silently, the night surrounding you. For a moment you thought to reach out to him, to press your lips to his and feel his body on yours. 

"Ella's been asking about you," you finally murmured, eyes cast towards the water, unable to keep looking into his eyes. One of the girls that worked the ale house was in fact asking about him but you already knew Sihtric wanted nothing to do with her.

You heard him grunt as if discontent but you ignored him, rubbing at your arms to wash yourself. The air around you felt thick with silence, your heart hammering in your chest. 

After a minute or so you peaked in Sihtric's direction. His shoulders were now clean and water was dripping from his hair into his face. 

"You still have some mud on your chin," you said as you gestured towards your own face. 

He mirrored your movement but missed the mud completely. 

Without thinking you reached out, running your hand across his chin gently. Your eyes met for a second but he pulled away immediately, almost as if you'd burned him. 

"Thanks," he muttered, his gaze lost in the forest. 

You nodded to yourself feeling stupid because for a split second you thought he had looked at you with interest. 

Angry with yourself you walked back to the shore, and out of the river. You rapidly dried yourself with your cloak as you tried hiding behind a bush. Your fingers felt frozen as you pulled on your clothes but you hurried nonetheless. 

When you turned, Sihtric was half dress, his tunic hanging around his neck as he pulled it on. 

"I should find Uthred," he all but whispered as he grabbed the torch. 

"You should," you replied quietly, following him back to the village, a sour taste in your mouth. 

Being a shield maiden sure had a lot of advantages but love sure wasn't one of them you thought to yourself


	2. Chapter 2

Morning came with barren skies, the sun shining brightly upon Coccham. Your night had been restless, dreams filled with dark eyes tracing your body through the forest. 

You dragged yourself out of your cabin to the stables, feeding the horses rapidly, making sure they had enough hay for the day.

By the time you were done you found most of the men sparring in the town square, the sound of wooden swords clashing together. You spotted Finan and Sihtric exchanging hard hits, their bodies moving easily with every step. It was somewhat mesmerizing to watch, the fluidity of their movement like a dance. 

You watched them as they kept going, joining Osferth who sat closely, observing the battle. 

"Restless?", he asked as you took a seat next to him, your leg bouncing up and down as you clasped your hands together. 

You nodded, eyes tracing over Sihtric's body as he absorbed one of Finan's hits, crouching before attacking the other man once more. He was beautiful to watch, so light on his feet and strong willed. 

You kept your eyes on them, admiring their skills and banter that came every few hits or when one of them was bested. 

Osferth moved slightly next to you before tapping your shoulder. You turned towards him. He held out a wooden practice sword to you, a smile fanning across his face. 

"A little lonely sword play maybe?" 

You couldn't help but mirror his smile as you accepted the makeshift weapon. It's weight felt familiar in your hand as you turned your wrist, gagging the pain in your shoulder. 

You could barely feel any, so you repeated the move, the sword now swinging around you in rapid circles. Approaching the practice dummy, you took a swing hitting it directly where an opponent's shoulder would be before moving back as if to avoid a counter attack. 

It was the first time in weeks that you felt the ecstacy of battle, your hair catching in the wind with your every move. The dummy vibrated with every hit, making you smile as you kept attacking.

After a few minutes you heard a familiar cough catching your attention. You turned towards the noise, feet catching in the dirt.

Uhtred stood with his arms crossed over his chest, brow arched as he observed you. He didn't seem too happy that you had decided to practice without permission and yet he said nothing.

"Just trying to move a little," you said as you rolled your shoulder, content that you could barely feel any pain. 

Uhtred hummed in response before grinning, knowing full well he couldn't keep you off the field forever. He waved in your direct, as if signalling to go on before he turned his attention towards a new recruit.

Osferth stood and joined you, his own wooden sword in hand. 

"Care to beat me relentlessly?", he asked, readying his sword.

You couldn't help but laugh as you got into position.

Finally, you thought. 

\----------------------------

In the early evening you found yourself brushing the horses again after feeding them. You were humming to yourself, hay in hand as you tended to Uhtred's mount. It was just after sunset, the warmth of the day still present, lingering around you.

You heard someone enter the stables but paid no attention to them, wanting to finish your task as quickly as possible. Everyone was already at the ale house, no doubt a few drinks in and their stomachs full. 

Your stomach grumbled as if to prove a point, making you sigh in frustration. 

Damn you Finan, you thought, a breeze of air making grimace from the smell of the stables. 

"Uhtred wishes to speak with you," you heard mumbled behind you. 

You frowned at the voice, turning to find Sihtric leaning against one of the stalls as he rubbed his horse's neck.

"Why would that be?" you replied, throwing the hay to the ground before looking up, tracing the shadows that moved across Sihtric's features from the nearby torch.

He shrugged, arms bulging with the movement, making you bite your bottom lip as you watched the gold arm bands around his biceps cling to his skin. 

"I have to finish with the horses," you muttered as you turned, cheeks reddening. 

Sihtric approached, grabbing an apple from a nearby bowl and presenting it to the horse you had been working on. 

"I'll take over for you."

You all but shivered as you felt him settle mere inches behind you. It was stupid to react so strongly to him but you couldn't help it. There was something about Sihtric that always had you on edge, your heart hammering in your chest even though he seemed oblivious.

He's doing as he's told, you thought to yourself before taking a step sideway, making sure your bodies didn't touch. 

"Thanks," you forced out as you watched him momentarily over your shoulder but he didn't look back at you. 

No, on the contrary Sihtric got to work immediately, brushing Uhtred's horse without another word or glance. 

You couldn't help the sting of disappointment that spread through you, your feet carrying you out the stables.   
It was annoying to lust after someone that saw right through you, that never regarded you with the same hunger you felt. 

Pushing the feelings aside you made your way to the ale house to find Uhtred, a little desperate to change your mind. 

\---------------------

Later that night you sat around a fire in Uhtred's long house surrounded by your familiar group. 

You were far along in your drinking, a cup of ale in hand as you laughed at something idiotic Finan said, leaning into the Irishman's side. 

Uhtred had finally agreed that you were to start training again, which had you in a good mood. Which in turn had resulted in a lot of alcohol. You were excited at the prospect of training even though you had agreed to take it slowly. Osferth was partially to thank no doubt for Uhtred's decision, always whispering advice in your Lord's ear. 

Smiling around the rim of your cup, you watched the men around you and Gisela wrapped around Uhtred. 

This was one of those nice evenings away from the prospect of battle and death. It was simple and easy, just friends and drinks. Yet a part of you still felt restless. Maybe you were thrumming with energy to train again, maybe you were just horny and couldn't let that out with who you really wanted. 

You eyed Sihtric across the fire, his gaze meeting yours and for once he didn't turn away immediately. He took a sip of his own cup dragging your attention to his mouth. It took every ounce of restraint for you not to groan as he licked his lips and finally looked away. 

With a sigh, you forced your gaze away, trying to focus on what the others were saying but your mind kept wandering. 

You craved release as you squeezed your thighs together, a little breathless and wanting. You could always ask Finan if he was up to it. It wouldn't be the first time you would get together. In the end it never really meant much, just a way to scratch an itch or spend lonely nights. Neither of you had ever felt the need to talk about it after and nothing between you had changed. So, it kept happening, every few months when one or the other couldn't be bothered to pursue someone else. 

It was easy, just release and nothing else but right now it didn't feel right. You wanted more as you watched Uhtred kiss his wife, felt the love and intimacy flowing between them.

All your life you had been brought up as a shield maiden. You craved battle and victory but sometimes part of you wanted more. Fighting would no doubt always be a part of your life but coming home to someone that wanted to cherish you didn't seem all that bad either. 

You sighed as you rubbed your forehead, suddenly wishing you were home alone. You felt Finan shift next to you a wordless are you alright in his eyes and you smiled, nodding. 

Chugging the last of your drink, you stood and said your goodbye before heading out. You shut the heavy wooden door behind yourself, taking a deep breath of the cool evening sir. 

Only a few steps in a hand wrapped itself around your wrist, making you stumble into someone's arms. Your heart caught in your throat, hopeful as you looked up to find out who was holding you.


	3. Chapter 3

  
Your vision narrowed in on the person holding you, your heart steadying.

"Hell Finan," you breathed as he helped you back up right. "You scared me to Valhalla and back."

You staggered on your feet slightly before regaining your footing even though you felt light on your feet. Punching Finan's shoulder, you stepped away from him, catching your breath. He rubbed at his shoulder, grunting in fake pain.

"Ya seemed a little flustered in there," Finan said as he watched you, his accent even thicker than usual from the ale.

"It's nothing," you tried as you looked away, not wanting to have this conversation. Even though you were close to him, the last thing you wanted to admit to Finan was that you had feelings for Sihtric. Not only would that mean showing vulnerability but also exposing yourself as a woman. It had taken long enough for you to be treated as a serious warrior, throwing a fit over a crush sure wasn't going to help.

As if Finan knew exactly what you were thinking, he said nothing for a few seconds, basking in the moonlight next to you. 

Finally you sighed audibly, rubbing at your arms for heat. You took a step towards Finan, leaning into him and he hugged you easily. 

"A little too much ale for the lady," he said with a laugh, his arm now wrapped around your shoulders, leading you towards your cabin.

You groaned in acknowledgement, trying to pull away, a bit too proud to accept Finan's help so easily but his arm tightened around you.

"Just getting ya home lass," he said with a smirk. "Not gonna do anything more."

And for once you stopped fighting, accepting Finan's help even though deep down you wished someone else was there by your side. You could blame the ale for being overly emotional. 

The two of you stumbled towards your cabin, Finan mumbling about sometime when he had been drunk back in Ireland. 

When you got to your front door he tapped your head likely like one would a child, making you glare at him.

Finan laughed once more, head thrown back with a hand on his belly as he watched you.

"The daggers in those eyes could kill," he mocked as he opened your front door, ushering you in. 

Too tired to argue you stepped passed him and into the cabin, grabbing his hand as you went. 

"Stay," you mumbled, leading him into the cabin. You suddenly didn't want to be alone, prefered company over nothing. 

Finan looked at you for a moment, your fingers lingering in his hand. He finally nodded, closing the door behind you. 

"Just sleep," he said as though he needed reassuring and you agreed with a nod turning towards the bedroom.

\------------------------------------

The morning sunlight shinned into the room, a warmth settling into the furs as you stretched. You kept your eyes closed as you bathed in the delight of a new day, training on your mind. You sighed into the furs, stretching once more, your hand bumping into hot skin.

Opening your eyes you saw Finan still deep asleep next to you, his arm thrown over his eyes as he snored softly. 

You remembered the previous night and your drunken walk home, Finan escorting you back. You also remembered that lonely feeling that had settled in your mind around the fire as you watched the others interacting. You couldn't help but ask Finan to stay in the end, not wanting to be alone.

This morning however you felt a little annoyed with yourself, your pride definitely hurt from showing weakness. You weren't used to this side of things, to be with people long enough to put down roots, to have feelings. 

You looked at Finan again, deciding to let him sleep as you got out of bed, putting on your gear for an early training. 

Stepping out of your cabin you closed the door lightly, turning toward the path to town only to jump in surprise. 

Sihtric stood a feet away from you, a smile on his face as he saw you, which had you staggering for a minute. You walked up to him slowly, wondering what he was doing here so early. 

"Sihtric," you said as you stopped before him. "What are you doing here?"

His smile widened as he watched you, no doubt noticing you had on your gear for training. 

"Got some good news for you," replied Sihtric, hand coming to rest on the hilt of his sword. 

Only then did you notice he was wearing all his armor, sword and dagger included. 

"Uhtred wants us to deliver a message to Aethelflaed as quickly as possible. We leave when you're ready."

"Really?" you asked, slightly surprised that Uhtred would allow you to go on a mission so quickly. Of course it was an easy mission and the likelihood of something going wrong were close to none yet you still radiated with enthusiasm at the idea of finally being back in action. 

Sihtric nodded, obliviously amused by your excitement. You smile brightly at him, glad that as usual he would be your partner. Although he was quiet around you, it was always easy to work with him and you enjoyed spending time by his side. 

But suddenly Sihtric's face changed. Every ounce of happiness was erased from his features as he seemingly swallowed around nothing.

Confused, you looked around, searching for any trouble only to see Finan closing the front door to your cabin, his tunic in hand, wearing nothing more than his sleeveless under shirt. 

He waved at you both, squinting from the sun as he approached you a huge grin on his face. 

Sihtric acknowledged Finan with a nod before turning back to you.

"I'll prepare the horses," he said lowly as he walked away, jogging towards the stables.

You felt your heart stammer for an instant, as you imagined what Sihtric was thinking at the moment. Part of you wanted to run after him and make sure he didn't have the wrong idea yet another part of you wondered why it mattered. He never showed any interest in you, never cared for your affection so why would he care if you slept with Finan. 

You watched him go as he disappeared into the stables, slightly annoyed. Finan stopped next to you, scratching his beard as he glanced where Sihtric had just been. 

"Are ya lot leaving?"

"Yeah," you exhaled, mentally kicking yourself. "To Mercia with a message for the Lady."

Refusing to let this affect you any longer, you took a deep breath smiling at Finan who smirked back at you. 

"Off to Mercia I go," you beamed, turning towards your cabin to get your sword and your pack for the journey ahead


	4. Chapter 4

By the time you got to lady Aethelflaed's estate, it was pouring rain, your boots sloshing as you approached the main hall. It had been a long ride, the nights spent in the forest awkward as both you and Sihtric stayed silent but for basic questions. During the ride, he took it upon himself to ride a little before you, assuring that there were very few conversations. 

With every hour spent together your annoyance grew and you felt like you were about to explode when you had finally reached your destination. The faster this was done the faster you could go home and pretend everything was fine once more.

Bowing as you approached Lady Aethelflaed, you tried to calm yourself, figuring you could deal with whatever problem Sihtric had once you were alone. . 

"Y/N, Sihtric what brings you to Mercia?" Aethelflaed said as she rose from her seat, surprise evident in her voice. 

You retrieved the message Uhtred had given you and that you had stored in your hip bag as you advanced towards Aethelflaed. "Our Lord sends his regards."

You slipped the piece of paper into her hand, retreating to stand next to Sihtric who remained silent, glancing your way before looking down at his feet. 

Lady Aethelflaed read the message quickly, her brows furrowing for a moment before she glanced at the both of you.

"It must have been a long trip for you, I will have a room prepared at the ale house where you can rest," she assured with a smile. "My response will be ready in the morning. I would not want to elongate your journey."

Both Sihtric and yourself bowed once more as she left, leaving her guard to escort you to the ale house.

****

Opening the door to your room, you were ready to settle down for a nap, your thighs burning from riding for the past few days. 

You sighed at the sight before you, moving aside so Sihtric could close the door. 

"There's only one bed," you said, dropping your pack by the fire. You started to take your armour and boots off, hoping the fire that was already lit would help them dry out before your departure in the morning. 

You could feel Sihtric watching you for a moment before he stepped up next to you, removing his own armour.

"I'll take the floor," he offered in a muted voice as he pulled off his tunic, exposing his bare chest. 

You couldn't help but look at him, his skin glistening from the rain as he moved to hang his armour by the fire. 

For a moment you wanted to argue, tell him he was being ridiculous and that you could share but for some reason you found yourself nodding quietly. 

You retreated to the bed, sitting on the edge to massage your feet. The fire crackled, warming you up rapidly. You were thankful to have a bed for the night, the forest floor far less comfortable. 

"We should talk," you finally said, exhaling heavily. Whatever was happening between you, you wanted to fix it.

Sihtric turned towards you, before leaning down, adding a log to the fire. He said nothing, his back now turned. 

A minute passed and Sihtric remained silent. Lying down you sighed loudly, feeling your eyes shut on their own accord. You reached for your dagger as a security measure and finally let yourself drift off, ignoring the other person in the room.

\----------

When you woke, you were warmer than expected. You opened your eyes to find a heavy fur had been placed over you. Seeking out Sihtric, you found him sitting on a stool next to the fire, a piece of bread in hand. 

He seemed pensive as he watched the flames, his chest no longer bare. A part of you ached to touch him, to run your fingers through his hair but you stayed still, admiring his profile. You could see the sun had already set, the room dark but for the fire in the corner. 

For a second you couldn't help but think how perfect life would be if it would be like this. Waking up to a great warrior by your side, feeling warm and content. Truth be told you wanted to forget all the awkwardness between the two of you, wanted to go back to how things used to be. Maybe he never cared for you but at least he used to treat you kindly, like you were his friend. 

You sighed into the furs, trying to think what to do. The noise seemed to give you away as Sihtric turned towards you, his eyes surprisingly soft as he noticed you were awake. 

"There's some food if you want," he said pointing to the small table by the bed. A plate filled with bread, cheese and fruit, sat on the edge of the wooden table, suddenly making your stomach rumble. 

You smiled at him as you sat up, reaching for a piece of cheese. His eyes traced your movement attentively. Trying to be coy you brought the piece of cheese slowly to your mouth, watching him as he watched you. 

Your eyes held each other, tension building and you couldn't help but grin around the food. 

Suddenly Sihtric stood, advancing towards you, your heart hitching as he approached. You held out your hand for him, thinking he would take it but he moved around the bed and towards the door. 

"I'll get some ale," he announced quickly, eyes cast to the ground and then he was gone, leaving you feeling a little heated and also cheated as you swallowed down the cheese. 

Forcing your eyes away from the door, you grabbed the plate of food and started eating slowly. You felt slightly ridiculous for thinking he had been coming towards you. Shaking your head, you kept eating, nibbling at the bread without purpose.

Within a minute or two, Sihtric was back, handing you a cup of ale as he sat by the fire with his own. He seemed on edge, foot tapping lightly on the wooden floor, drawing your attention.

Silence settled between you once more as you finished your food, enjoying the ale as much as you could considering the state of things. 

After a while you wondered what the message you had carried was actually about. You knew the Danes were littering the Mercian border and that Edward feared they would advance soon but Uhtred had kept the content of his message secret. 

It wasn't unlike him, afterall you and Sihtric were simple soldiers and as much as your Lord confided in you, some things were always left unsaid. 

"Do you know why we're here?" you asked Sihtric curiously. Uhtred had spoken to him after all before sending both of you to Mercia. 

Sihtric shook his head, gazing into the fire. "It's been too long since the Danes have attacked. They must be planning something."

You nodded in agreement, knowing peace rarely lasted. The prospect of battle had you restless as you stood, stretching your muscles. You grabbed your sword and holster that had been leaning against the wall, fitting them back onto yourself. 

"I need some air," you said quietly. 

Immediately Sihtric was standing, grabbing his own sword but you waved your hand at him.

"I'm fine on my own," you assured him before stepping out rapidly, not wanting him to argue. 

You walked down the stairs into the chaos of the ale house. Men stared at you as you walked by, keeping a tight hold on your sword, your head held high as you strutted out. 

You knew they stared at you not only because you were a Dane but also because you were a woman. Two things that to these English men made no sense. Women didn't belong on the battlefield to them and Dane women deserved to die and nothing more. 

You exhaled the breath you had been holding when you finally walked out, the air thick from the recent rainfall. 

Sitting at one of the empty tables that littered the side of the ale house, you drank from the cup of ale you had brought with you the other hand still on your sword. 

\-------------

When you finally walked back into your room, Sihtric was sitting on the floor by the fire, hands in his hair as he tried braiding the middle section once more. Your journey had loosened the locks no doubt, the beads already heavy when you had left. 

"Need some help?" You offered as you disarmed once more, taking a seat next to him. 

He shook his head, making the last plait with a grunt when some hair caught in the silver beard. 

"I was about to sleep," he admitted as he lied back, hand behind his head. 

You steered your eyes away from the taunt skin of his stomach now exposed, standing just as quickly as you had sat. 

"Ok," you whispered, swallowing your disappointment. You missed braiding his hair, talking with him, everything really.

Forcing a smile you laid on the bed once more, arm over your eyes to cover the light coming from the fire.

You listened to Sihtric breathing, the constant rhythm calming you. Shivering into the furs, you covered yourself, slightly guilty that Sihtric refused to join you. 

"Are you sure you don't want to come up here?" you encountered again, hoping he would change his mind but he whispered a quiet no, face turned towards the flames. 

Shaking your head, you threw a fur at him, hoping he would at least accept it. Damn fool, you thought as you turned to your side, closing your eyes.

Time ticked by, rain once again falling, the chaos of the ale house calming. 

But no matter how hard you tried, you found yourself unable to sleep. Hours passed and you could hear Sihtric rolling over constantly on the hard floor, groaning as he no doubt tried to find a comfortable position to fall asleep in. 

"Sihtric," you finally sighed, sitting up in bed, the furs falling around your waist. "Get in the bed please. You're making me crazy."

For a few seconds neither of you moved nor said anything. A little exasperated, you let yourself fall back into the bed, staring at the ceiling. 

Finally, you heard some movement, shadows moving across the room. The bed dipped as Sihtric sat on the edge. You could see his dark figure as he rubbed at his face, groaning before laying down next to you. 

You felt his warmth almost immediately, fingers itching to spread over his stomach. His breath fanned over you for a second as he settled more comfortably, his hand brushing your arm accidentally. 

The apology fell from his lips almost instantly and you stopped him, hand coming to rub his chest through his tunic. 

A surge of confidence filled you as you moved closer, laying your head on his shoulder and for once Sihtric didn't argue, wrapping his arm around your shoulder. 

You sighed pleased, nuzzling into his chest as you closed your eyes, cuddling into the warmth of him as sleep overcame you. 

Maybe things would be alright afterall.


	5. Chapter 5

  
You departed from Mercia early in the morning, hoping to get as much riding done before you had to rest for the night. The rain seemed to have stopped a few hours before, the muddy ground still littered with puddles.

Lady Aethelflaed had her guard deliver her letter to the stables while you had been getting ready, saving you some time and pleasentries. 

Trotting up to Sihtric, you came to a stop next to him, observing the view from atop the hill. 

"Still no one in sight," he stated as he kept his eye on the horizon. 

You nodded in response, glad you hadn't come by anyone trying to cause trouble. Kicking your horse back to a canter, Sihtric followed close behind as you settled into a comfortable rhythm. 

Admiring the view, you got lost in your thoughts, remembering waking up to Sihtric wrapped around you, his arm around your waist and his nose nuzzled in your neck. A smile had bloomed across your face as you bathed in the early morning sun, beyond content. Neither of you had said anything about it after but at least things were now a lot less awkward. Sihtric no longer ignored you or spent his time galloping away from you.

Grinning to yourself silently you watched Sihtric from the corner of your eye, feeling better than ever.

\---------------

You decided to stop as the sun was setting, huddled in a far corner of the forest, away from traders paths. Sihtric rapidly started a fire as you gathered dry wood that lay dead on the forest floor. 

Sitting around the fire, you munched on the piece of salted meat Lady Aethelflaed had generously given you before your departure, watching your companion over the dancing flames do the same. 

"Tired?" you asked once you finished your food, reaching for your pack. You retrieved your fur cloak from the bottom, stretching it over your legs, seeking heat. 

Shaking his head, Sihtric stood, kicked at the fire to settle the flames into ambers. 

He walked towards you slowly, his sword in hand as he sat next to you. 

Tapping his side he smiled, inviting you to huddle in next to him.

"The night will be cold," he said as if he needed an excuse for your proximity. 

Dragging yourself to his side you offered the side of your cloak to him. He took the edge, pulling it so it would cover the bother of you. 

You hid your smile in his chest as you wrapped an arm around him, the feeling seeming oddly familiar. Feeling his finger run up your back gently, you pressed closer, lips catching on his armour. 

"Y/N?" Sihtric all but whispered, his voice soft, almost pleading. 

Hearing your name fall from his lips so sweetly had your mind in chaos. You forced your eyes up to his face, breath catching when you finally looked into his eyes. The moon seemed to reflect the entire night sky in them as you watched him, his features so beautiful. 

His free hand pushed your fringe out of your face, skimming your cheek at the same time as it settled under your chin. You couldn't help but shiver, his touch something you had craved for so long as he tilted your head up.

Your lips finally brushed Sihtric's slightly as you hesitated, your heart hammering in your chest. The arm at your back pulled you closer, making you whimper as his mouth descended upon yours, kissing you breathless.

He licked at your lips, demanding for more and you couldn't help but give him everything. You forced yourself up, straddling his legs so you could gently slide your hands over his face, kissing him as if you never would again. 

Sihtric's hands travelled across your body, settling at the bottom of your back. He pulled you even closer to him, your bodies now so close you could feel him grow hard under you as you bit at his lips, making him groan. 

You ran a hand into his hair, tilting his head back as you kept kissing him, your other hand rubbing down his chest plate. You wanted it off, wanted everything between the two of you gone but you knew how dangerous it would be at the moment. 

As if to prove your point, you heard horses galloping in the forest, forcing you to pull away, fear striking you. Without thinking you reacted, grabbing Sihtric's hand and pulling him behind the nearest tree to hide. 

Within seconds Danes rode mere meters away from you, the sound of the horses' hooves echoing through the darkness. 

You held your breath, hand still holding Sihtric's, as you rapidly watched them disappear, thanking Odin for his protection. 

"There shouldn't be any Danes here," Sihtric finally breathed out as you turned to face him. 

You nodded in agreement, still breathless as you clung to one another. 

"We should leave immediately, Uhtred needs to know," you muttered as you moved away. 

You grabbed your cloak, shoving it into your pack quickly as Sihtric untied the horses, handing you the lead to yours.

If you wanted to warn Uhtred in time you would have to ride day in and day out.   
\----------------

It was dusk when you finally made it back to Coccham, torches lit over town, making you sigh in relief. You stopped your horse by the stables, Sihtric stopping next to you. 

Surprisingly Finan appeared out of nowhere, concern in his face as he eyed the both of you. 

"What are you doing here already?" he asked as he helped you off your horse, your legs numb from riding so long. 

"Danes," you replied simply, looking around for Sihtric. The man looked at you with intense attention. You hadn't had the time to speak about the kiss since and part of you couldn't help but thinking about it. 

For now however you pushed it to the back of your mind, stumbling forward. 

Passing you the torch he was holding, Finan took the lead to both your horses, encouraging you towards Uhtred's home. 

At a rapid pace you walked towards Uhtred's long house next to Sihtric. The prospect of battle eminent. 

\----------------

Turned out Uhtred had already known about the Danes, his letter to Lady Aethelflaed a warning for what was to come. You were to gather in a week's time by the great Alkin mountains to cut-off their path. 

There was very little time left to prepare, the whole town preparing provisions, weapons and horses. After sleeping for a few hours, you had been placed on weapon duty, making sure none were broken and sharpening those in need. 

You had spent the last two days slaving away, hands bloody and beat from the stone press. 

It was now the last evening before your departure and you were finishing the last of the weapons, bone tired as you finally made your way back to your cabin. 

You were covered in filth, your fingers black from soothe as you sighed sleepily. The town was still buzzing as men prepared themselves for the days to come. For once the ale house seemed empty as you walked by. 

Pushing the door to your cabin open you were surprised to find Finan sitting there, eyes closed as if he was trying to doze off. 

Closing the door a little harder than necessary had him stumbling awake as you smirked his way, raising a brow as if to say, why are you here?

"Y/N," he grinned as he stood, a jar in hand. "Hild sent me to help you."

"Help me?" you inquired as you unlaced the side of your chest plate, glancing his way as he approached to help with the other side. 

"Aye," Finan continued, fingers working on the laces down your other side. "It's a paste for your shoulder, it should help during battle."

You nodded as you finally managed to pass your armour over your head, fingers tired. 

He signaled for you to sit on the bed, and you went easily, too exhausted to argue. With your back to him you removed your tunic, keeping lightly pressed to your breast to stay covered but exposing your shoulders and back. 

You felt the bed dip from Finan's weight as he kneeled behind you, the sound of the jar opening as you leaned your head forward. The first touch to your shoulder had you hissing from the cold, followed quickly by Finan's apology. 

He worked the paste into your skin, your body tense from his rough hands working your muscles. You couldn't help but groan, head lolling to the side. 

You heard the knock at the door, only having time to turn to watch as Sihtric stepped in, stopping immediately as he spotted you, half naked with Finan's hands on you. 

His fumbled apology echoed in the silent cabin, the door closing rapidly behind him as he all but ran out the door. 

Swearing under your breath, you shuffled off the bed, pulling your tunic on as you followed after him. 

This can't be happening, you thought as you ran after him, calling his name but he ignored you. 

"Sihtric please", you shouted desperately, stopping in his tracks, watching him as he finally turned to face you. 

His head was down, features dark and you couldn't help but swallow around nothing as you approached him cautiously, hands trembling.


	6. Chapter 6

Sihtric watched you intensely when you stopped before him, his chest heaving with every breath he took.

You stood in front of him, a little tongue tied, not wanting to justify yourself but at the same time needing to say something. 

"Why did you leave?" you finally settled on as you gazed at him, biting your lip anxiously. 

He shrugged, eyes cast down as if to avoid you. "You and Finan seemed occupied." 

You couldn't help but watch him, his arms bulging as he fisted his hands and released them. He seemed to be fighting with himself, unsure and restless. 

"Finan's my friend," you said honestly as you waited for Sihtric's reaction but it never came. 

There were little words to be said at such a time so you chose to remain silent as you observed him, your heart aching to touch him.

Offering him your hand you were surprised when he took it, following you as you made your way back to your cabin. Luckily, Finan had made himself scarce, no doubt knowing that his presence wouldn't be appreciated at the moment. 

You grabbed the jar that he had left on the bed, showing it to Sihtric. 

"Hild gave him this for my shoulder," you said simply. 

Sihtric took the jar in his hand, a small sigh escaping him as he looked at you from underneath his long lashes. 

He handed the jar back to you, this time reaching for your hand, fingers intertwining with yours . 

"I was hoping you would join me," Sihtric admitted as he pressed a kiss to the top of your hand and then to every fingertip. 

You felt your cheeks redden, disbelief running through you as you nodded without even knowing what he wanted. 

"A dip in the river perhaps," he explained as he grabbed your cloak, wrapping it around your shoulders. 

"I desperately need one," you relented with a laugh, looking down at your soothe covered hands, no doubt your face was no better. 

Sihtric remained silent, nothing but a gentle smile on his face as he led you outside. 

It was a relatively warm night, the stars shining brightly as you walked down the path to the river. Every few seconds Sihtric would glance your way and you couldn't help but do the same, stomach in knots at the thought of what was to come. 

You were surprised to find no one else at the river, the water calm as you settled your torch and cloak by the shore. 

With your back turned to one another you undressed quickly, stepping into the water until your breasts were covered by the dark tide. When you pivoted towards the shore, Sihtric was still adjusting the torch while naked, his body exposed for your eyes to devour.

His back was packed with muscle, shoulders so strong leading into a small waist and a glorious round ass. You found yourself shying away from the sight, wanting to allow him his privacy but at the same time, barely able to keep your eyes off of him. 

Concentrating on your soiled hands, you rubbed them together, your normal color eventually coming to. You dipped underwater, coming up to breathe as you looked back to the shore, finding Sihtric only a few feet away, his own hair now dripping wet.

He smiled at you, advancing in the water until he stood just before you. You were captivated by him, watching droplets of water streak his sharp features as he came to a halt next to you. 

"Thank you," you said gently, watching him through your lashes. "I needed this."

His wet fingers came up to move the hair out of your face before cupping your cheek as if asking permission. You leaned into the touch, closing your eyes, needing him to say something. 

You heard your name tumble from his lips mere inches away from yours, the vibrations making you shiver as you closed the gap between you, finally kissing him.

His mouth was soft and plush as you licked at his lips, asking for entry and Sihtric relinquished with a sigh, arms wrapping around your waist. 

The hardness of his body against yours invigorated you, your fingers running through his damp hair, holding him closer. 

Heat blossomed in your stomach as you held him against you, biting at his bottom lip only to see a new fire explode in his eyes.

Sihtric pulled away, slowly shifting you so he stood behind you, chin resting upon your shoulder, his hands pressed to your stomach, gently caressing down your thighs. His lips at your ear made you quiver in anticipation, his fingers slowly teasing you. 

"Sihtric," you pleaded, your voice coming out raspy with need. 

You couldn't help but push back into him, moaning when you felt his hard length pressed against you. 

Kissing your neck he dragged out the pleasure, teasing you relentlessly with his mouth and fingers, all while keeping you pressed against him.

The water brushed against your nipples as Sihtric's talented fingers finally delved inside you, making you gasp, body arching towards his touch. His thumb found your clit, circling it lightly. You couldn't think as you rocked with his hand, seeking your own pleasure but wanting more.   
As a soft cry fell from your mouth you managed to push his hand away and swivel in his arms. 

A worried look spread through his face but you kissed him reassuringly. 

"I've waited too long for this not to see you," you admitted breathlessly, pushing your forehead against his. 

A beat of silence passed, the wind rustling the leaves of the trees surrounding you as you bathed in each other's attention before Sihtric finally nodded, dragging you back to the shore as quickly as he could. 

Grabbing your clothes, you dressed rapidly, skin sticking to every fabric in your hasted endeavour. 

You couldn't help but grin devilishly at him as you finished dressing, grasping his hand in yours as you started going back towards the village. Luckily it was deserted, no one there to notice how flush you were, running with nothing but your tunic and boots.

As you pushed into your cabin you dropped the remainder of your clothing on the floor, turning to face Sihtric once more. 

Grabbing the hammer necklace around his neck, you pulled him to you, kissing him like the first time, wanting everything he had promised without words. 

Yet Sihtric pulled away, motioning towards the bed as you both moved to stand before it.

The candle light in the room drew shadows across his face, making your fingers itch from the intimacy of it all. For the first time in a long time you felt shy as you watched him. It wasn't as if this was your first time, but Sihtric wasn't like everyone else. On the contrary you thought as you swallowed, he meant everything. 

Eventually he took a step forth, coming to a stop just before touching you. Unable to stop yourself, you reached out, running your hand down his chest, feeling the muscle through his tunic. Sihtric bit his lip at the touch, reaching for the bottom of his tunic and pulling it over his head, exposing himself. 

You swallowed around nothing, watching him attentively, fingers now trailing over his naked abdomen. You felt him shiver into the touch, edging you on as you closed the last few inches between you, kissing a trail down his jaw, loving how he leaned into the touch.

At the same time, Sihtric caressed his hands over your hips before settling on your ass, a wicked grin on his face as he pulled you into his chest. 

"You're not the only one that's been waiting for this," he whispered before taking your mouth, helping you out of your tunic before you finally stood completely bare before him.

He pulled away to look at you, eyes heated as his mouth descended upon your body, kissing a path down your chest until he held both your breasts in his hand. You were left gasping for air when he sucked one of your nipples into his mouth, tweaking the other gently.

You moaned, hands threading through his hair and down his back without thought, nails catching in his skin. Overwhelmed, wanting more, you pulled him back up, kissing him once more as you reached for the laces of his trousers. 

Finally you both stood naked, hands roaming over each other, a moment of pure appreciation in such a heated encounter.

Wrapping a leg around Sihtric's waist, you mouthed at his neck, working your way to his lips as he raised you into his arm, making you squirm as he carried you. 

Gently placing you on the furs of the bed he looked over you, fingers gently caressing down your body teasingly. 

Sihtric kissed your thighs as they opened for him. He kneeled between your legs, breath fanning over you as you shivered, watching him as he finally put his mouth on you.

You couldn't help but arch into his touch, his tongue delving inside of you without warning before being joined by his finger. The sensation had you withering, hands fisting the furs around you. 

"Sihtric," you groaned out, hands stretching to touch him, wanting him in every which way possible. 

The push and pull sensation had you twisting your hips as you tried to match his rhythm breathlessly. You felt him moan against you as he sucked on your clit, adding a second finger and pushing even deeper. 

Before long you were grasping for his hair, pulling on the silky black strands till he was pulling off, mouth glistening. 

Crawling towards you, Sihtric nosed at your body, kissing along your breasts until you were face to face once more. You ran your hands down his back, fingers digging in his skin, wanting him closer and at the same time, wanting to leave a mark. 

Reaching for his cock, you stroked him, once, twice and again, feeling the pre-come ooze out from the tip. He bit into your shoulder, muscle in your back tensing from the pain but it only edged you on as you kept going, wanting to offer him the same pleasure. 

Within seconds your hand was slick with his juices making it easy to keep stroking him as he pulsed in your hand. 

"Enough," Sihtric finally growled in your ear, snaking his hand around yours as he positioned himself at your entrance.

Your eyes locked together, fire building through you as he entered you, one slick thrust until he could no longer move.  
You held your breath, his face hidden in your neck until he finally raised himself onto his forearms, pulling out and pushing back in. 

The moan that escaped you resonated through the small cabin, your hands coming to push at his shoulders as Sihtric started thrusting into you at a steady rhythm. You dug your nails into his back, rocking with him, every stroke feeling deeper and deeper. 

You could hear him grunt in your ear, his pleasure marked into your skin as you tightened around him repeatedly, feeling the way it made his body respond, pushing him towards orgasm.

Wrapping your legs around his waist, you felt the angle change, the muscle in his back twitching beautifully as you twisted your hips, pushing him onto his back.

Sihtric's eyes widened as he watched you, palms coming up to massage your breasts as you leaned in, working your hips into wide circles. 

The sounds he made spured you on as he started fucking up into you, adding to your every move, your clit rubbing perfectly against him. Within minutes you were on edge, hands scraping down his chest as you chased your orgasm. All it took was a simple kiss to your wrist, making you come, his name a prayer to the gods on your lips. 

Even then, Sihtric kept pushing into you, holding your hips until you were scrambling away with an elusive grin. 

Sitting up behind you, he kissed your neck, rubbing your back as you refocused, now simply wanting him to feel the same ecstacy. 

"Take what you want," you groaned as you pushed yourself onto all fours. 

You could feel his eyes on you, hands finding your hips once more as he entered you from behind, making you whimper into the furs. The pace he set was brutal, his hips snapping forward over and over again until he slowed, bending over you. With his chest now plastered to your back, he moved once more, a new angle forcing little sounds of pleasure out of you.

Chanting his name out, you worked your hips back into everyone of his thrusts, desperate for more, for him. You could feel another orgasm coming as his hands came to cover yours, intertwining your fingers. 

The intimacy of the gesture caught you by surprise as you cried out, your orgasm ripping through you. At the same time you felt Sihtric's hips stutter, your orgasm making you tighten around him, forcing him to come as he sunk his teeth into your shoulder. 

Breathless, you let yourself fall into the bed, Sihtric's weight a comforting pressure over you as you regained your thoughts, feeling winded and fucked out. The thought of a bite mark to carry into battle with you loomed in your mind making you sigh happily as his fingers trailed over your hip. 

You felt Sihtric finally pull out as he rubbed kisses into your strained back muscles, praises falling from his mouth until he faced you, kissing you with such urgency you felt your heart hammer in your chest. 

Truth be told, this was the feeling you had been waiting for as you settled in his arms, listening to his every breath as you traced the gold band upon his arms lovingly. 

No battle or victory could beat this.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Please read notes at the end

The morning sky was scattered with colour, pink clouds enveloped by orange sun rays as light finally reached Coccham. 

You sat atop Uhtred's long house, admiring nature's show carefully as you thought of today's battle and what was to come. 

Fiddling with the leather strap holding your braids together, you tugged it off, undoing every plait carefully, removing the silver beads and making a nest pile by your side. 

When you were done you grabbed the antler comb you had fastened last autumn and brushed out your hair, the waves catching in the wind. 

You heard footsteps behind you as you finished combing your hair, smiling as you looked back and saw Sihtric coming near you. He wasn't wearing his armour, a simple black tunic falling from his shoulders, making him look soft and relaxed. 

Sihtric mirrored your smile as he approached, wrapping his cloak around your shoulders before settling next to you.   
  
Fiddling with comb you observed him for a moment, tracing the tattoo down his neck with your eyes, heated memories of the previous night coming to mind. You still felt the bite mark sting in the skin of your shoulder, your heart aching similarly. 

"Thinking of battle?" Sihtric finally asked, breaking the silence. 

He was looking at the horizon, laying back on his hand, looking completely at ease. If you didn't know what was to come, you could never imagine you were preparing for a fight. 

Unable to contain your grin, you started brushing your hair once more mindlessly while looking at him through your lashes. 

"I have other things on my mind."

The look on Sihtric's face softened as he shuffled behind you, placing a leg on either side of you. 

"Let me help," he whispered as he moved your hair aside, kissing your nape.

You sighed into the touch, leaning into him as he started braiding your hair back together. Watching the sun rise you lost yourself in thought, listening to Sihtric's heartbeat anchoring you to the present. You felt content to stay silent as he worked, the world around you slowly coming to life. 

By the time Sihtric was done you could see some of the villagers starting their day, the smell of fresh bread thick in the air. You knew you would have to get going soon but part of you wanted to stay here forever. 

Sihtric wrapped his arms around you, breath fanning across your face. You turned slightly, pressing a soft kiss to his cheek as a thank you. There was so much you wanted to say and yet nothing that could be said at the moment. 

You bathed into the beauty and peacefulness of the morning, Sihtric wrapped around you, thinking how you could do this countless times. 

  
\---------------

You stood at the bottom of the Atkin mountain next to Uhtred, watching afar as men scattered through the forest silently. The ride had been rapid enough, giving plenty of time to set up the ambush properly. 

"It will work, Lord," you assured Uhtred, raising your hand to press to his shoulder reassuringly. 

He nodded but kept watching the path the Danes were supposed to take, no doubt hoping the Mercians were already hiding in the adjoining forest. 

Letting your hand fall to your side you searched your surroundings for Sihtric, finding him nearby with Finan whispering but too far away for you to hear them. You watched them momentarily, restlessly shifting in place. 

After a few minutes they came forward, Finan going directly to stand next to Uhtred while Sihtric stopped behind you. 

He slipped his hand around your waist to rest on your stomach for a second and then it was gone, his usual stoic facade back in place. 

You glanced back at him, understanding the need for proximity but also the thrill and seriousness that settled in everyone's bones before battle.

Turning to face him, you pressed your forehead to his, wrapping your hand around Thor's hammer that rested on Sihtric's chest. You kissed the cool metal before tucking it under his armor, bathing into the soon to fade tranquillity. 

You could hear Finan and Uhtred discussing, the call for preparation finally being given. Pulling away from Sihtric you watched him, the way his jaw tightened and he nodded with so many unsaid promises. 

Turning to face the clearing you listened as Finan dispersed the order for battle, everyone now focused on the fight to come. You pulled out both your swords, feeling their familiar weights in your hands, heart racing.

"Be prepared," you heard Uhtred mutter to Osferth who stood behind him, his chainmail looking oddly large on his lithe physique. 

The rustling leaves covered the rare sounds of the men moving in the forest, most now standing near the clearing but still hidden by the trees. 

Time passed, your feet started to ache slightly as you balanced your weight from foot to foot, itching to start fighting.

Finally you saw someone approaching, whistling lowly to drag Uhtred's attention to where you pointed with your sword. 

Uhtred waited, watching as Danes riding horses slowly came in sight. The leader passed by, making everyone sneer as they forced themselves to stay focused. The plan was to wait until he was farther along, to attack the end of the line and thus completely take them by surprise. 

"On my command," Uhtred announced silently, taking a cautious step forth. 

You swiveled your swords around in anticipation, eyes blazing as you watched the enemies walk by unknowingly. 

When the command to charge finally came, you were buzzing with energy, taking off into a reckless run. The first kill was way too easy, the other completely off guard when you pierced his neck with your sword, blood pouring from his mouth before you were on to the next. 

The second had his sword out but was still too stunned when you attacked to truly counter your strike. Two blows and he was down. 

After that the fight turned into chaos, horses being frightened away and throwing off their cavaliers as you raged on. 

A particular giant Dane came for you, axe waving violently towards your head but your sharp movements and speed made him easy to counterstep and block with one sword, slashing at the back of his knee with the other. He grunted in agony, blood splashing across your face as you stabbed him in the back rapidly to avoid a redhead's hit to your head. 

You rolled on the ground, kneeling as you swiped your sword in a circle around you, protecting yourself before regaining your footing. The redheaded man attacked you once more as you jumped out of the way, striking down into his shoulder as you lept onto his back, plunging your sword at the base of his neck. 

Another came and your movements blurred together, your body at ease in this dance you had perfected for years, training thousands of hours to be the perfect soldier. 

Through the screams of horror and pain you felt alive, every strike of your sword swift and deadly, the bruises in your skin from the previous night a reminder and a reason why to live. 

\----------------

The sky was starting to darken by the time the battle was ultimately won, the Atkin valley a field of blood and death. 

When everything had finally slowed, you'd found Sihtric nearby, finishing off his own enemy. Your eyes had met for an instant, your heart calmed and reassured at the site. Even if you craved his lips upon yours you tried to remain focused, assessing the dead and locating the others. 

Luckily Uhtred hadn't lost too many men, most of the dead being Danes and Mercians. It was a small price to pay to avoid a war Uhtred had reminded Aethelflaed and in her sorrow she had agreed. 

Now all were focused on killing the wounded or gathering prisoners of war, a rotten task but a necessary one. You walked the fields aimlessly, plunging your sword into dead bodies. For a moment you stopped, closing your eyes, the breeze on your face helping to ground you as you kept going.

Opening your eyes, you kept going, working mindlessly until a glimmer of armour caught your attention. You sword under your breath athe the sight, every instinct screaming in your body. In the distance you saw a man crawling on the ground, bow and arrow in hand pointing directly towards Uhtred. You screamed, bolting in your Lord's direction as the arrow was shot off, seeing Finan slash down the enemy easily. 

Your lungs burned for the sprint, the arrow piercing through the air as you could do nothing but force your body to go quicker. It all happened so fast as you collided with Uhtred, pushing him out of the way as you landed over him, heart heaving. 

You rolled over and away from him, pleased to rapidly see him kneel next to you before realizing something was wrong. Tasting blood, you groaned, finally seeing the arrow that had struck just beneath your shoulder. Pain erupted through you, voices blurring through your head as you tried to focus. Within seconds Finan was next to you, hands pushing against your wound making you gasp, blood spilling from your lips. 

Uhtred was barking orders but the words didn't make sense in your mind, your eyes seeking only one thing. When you finally found him, he was running towards you, grief stricken. 

He kneeled next to you, fingers weaving with yours before reaching for your sword, wrapping your fingers around the hilt. You forced a smile, memorizing every edge of his face as your vision darkened.

Truth be told, you would wait a lifetime in Valhalla to see him again.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Not a death fic fyi.


	8. Chapter 8

  
A buzzing sound resonated constantly, a pulsing that was unrecognizable through your bones making you groan. You felt heavy, unable to move and barely conscious as you seeked out light, sound, anything to ground you. 

Your entire body felt hot, fingers aching as you tried to move them to no avail. Pressure was building in your body, shoulder in so much pain but you couldn't scream, unable to find your voice. Before long you saw darkness again as it dragged you into a horrifying abyss. 

\---------------

When you finally managed to open your eyes, you could barely see anything, an unfamiliar room surrounding you, dark in every corner but for a few candles near you. 

Grunting in pain, you tried to stand, to sit up but your body refused to move. Deciding to start smaller you tried moving your toes slightly, delighted when you felt blankets over you move. 

You forced your eyes closed, a sick feeling in your stomach spreading through you if you kept them open a little too long. Waiting a few seconds you opened them once more, this time trying to assess your body. 

There was a bloody bandage wrapped around your shoulder and chest making every small movement painful. Apart from that everything seemed relatively normal, your hands aching as you opened and closed your fists. 

You sighed, trying to focus on those small victories as you spotted your swords leaning against the wall. They were clean, the metal shining in the candle light which didn't make much sense to you. 

Battle was all you recalled, blood and enemies. You didn't remember being injured, the word feeling like acid on your tongue. 

The door at your right opened, dragging your attention to it. A man stood in the shadows, watching you before he approached. His feet scratched on the floor but you couldn't pull your eyes away from his face. 

His dark eyes held yours for a second before he fell kneeling by your side, head bowed, forehead against your hand. 

You could feel tears against your skin as you observed him, an intricate tattoo hidden by his black hair leading down his neck.

"Sihtric," you whispered unknowingly, the name familiar on your tongue but lost in your mind. 

The man's head whipped up suddenly, his piercing gaze watching you attentively but before you could say anything else, another man walked in, this one you didn't recognize. 

Sihtric seemed unfazed, the man coming to your other side to offer you a cup with a weird looking concoction. 

"Drink, it will help," he muttered, eyes cast down. 

You felt uncertain, the liquids smell making you recoil but Sihtric encouraged you, nodding as he took hold of the cup. You allowed him to help, the cup now against your mouth as he tilted it up. The taste was repulsive but you forced yourself to swallow it down, trusting Sihtric. 

"I will advise Lord Uhtred that she is awake," the man said as he departed, closing the door behind him.

The mention of Uhtred's name brought back memories of fire and pain, running and terror but you didn't understand it. You sat, confused by your own mind, until light fingers upon your wrist dragged you out of your head.

"The healer says you will be fine," Sihtric mumbled against the skin of your wrist, his lips against you making your breath catch in your throat. "I thought you were dead."

So did I, you thought to yourself but didn't say, reaching out to press your palm to Sihtric's cheek, forcing a smile. 

"Lay with me," you finally whispered, needing his proximity even if you didn't understand it. 

Sihtric seemed to hesitate, the worry in his eyes evident as he stood next to the bed before finally sitting on the edge and aging down.

You could stop yourself from approaching him, intertwining your fingers together before kissing his shoulder. You didn't quite understand it but it made sense to you so rather than argue with yourself you closed your eyes, letting darkness overtake you once more.  
\--------------

A week after you had woken up you were restless, tired of being told to stay in bed and relax, that you needed to heal before you moved. Sihtric spent a lot of time with you, no doubt trying to distract you from boredom but you craved fresh air and adventure, your mind healing much faster than your body. 

After a few days you had remembered the events that had landed you in a bed, fighting to survive for days. You remembered your companions, Finan and Osferth whom both visited you, Finan sneaking in some ale to appease you as you complained you needed to get out of these four walls. 

Uhtred had also visited on numerous occasions, making sure you had the best care and were recovering but he insisted you stayed in bed, not wanting to hinder your recovery. 

One night he had walked in a little somber, apologizing for your injury, thanking you for your sacrifice and you laughed for the first time in a while. Taking his hand you had assured him there was no need for an apology, that you would do it time and time again. He was your Lord and you promised to protect and serve him no matter the consequences.

Finally, you remembered Sihtric, the awkward looks and conversations leading to breathless kisses and a night of passion. Once you remembered your mind opened like a damn, memories upon memories of thoughts, feelings and desires all linked to one man. It was hard to deal with a first, feeling like you were drowning in so much but Sihtric kept you grounded every step of the way. 

By the second week however you could no longer stay in bed, desperate to ride home to Coccham, knowing that the only reason the men were still here was because they thought you couldn't make it home. 

Hard-headed as ever, you woke one sunny morning, groaning as you managed to make your way out of bed, dressing and strapping on your weapons before making your way to the stables. 

You crossed Finan in the hallway outside your room in the Mercian estate, his panic evident as he tried to hoard you back to bed before Uhtred or Sihtric saw you. 

"I'm fine, Finan" you assured him with a smile, hand on the hilt of your sword. "Now please get out of my way before I have to teach you a lesson."

He moved aside immediately, watching you as he followed you out, a huge grin on his face, knowing that no man was going to stop you today. 

After that it was easy. You convinced Uhtred it was time to go home and to appease Sihtric you agreed to ride with him all the way back to Coccham. 

You spent two days riding, your back pressed to Sihtric's chest, his arms wrapped around you and even though you hated to think you needed help, you felt better in his arms than anywhere else. 

\---------------------

You were warm and sleepy, eyes still closed as you hoped to fall asleep once more. The bed was beyond comfortable, Sihtric's heated skin under your hand as you rubbed nonsensical patterns into his abdomen, feeling at peace.

Fingers ran over your body, a light caress that had you shivering, cuddling even closer into Sihtric's side. Your lips caught on his skin making you sigh happily. 

"I know you're awake Y/N," you heard Sihtric laugh into your hair, his hand skimming down your back. 

Groaning you pressed your face into his side, biting him gently. He squirmed away but you only cuddled closer, needing his presence and warmth. His fingers ran along your shoulder, skimming your most recent scar before kissing your forehead, pushing you onto your back so he could settle over you. 

You went easily, finally opening your eyes to your favorite sight. Sihtric was leaning over you, arms on either side of your head holding him up, bulging with muscles that had you coming up with delicious images.

Holding breath as he leaned in, kissing your neck and down your chest you moaned lightly, threading your fingers through his hair. Pulling on the silky strands you brought Sihtric's lips to your own, kissing him deeply. 

You felt your breath leave you, body tingling and heart pounding as you kept kissing him, pouring every word your pride kept you from saying into it. 

Being a shield maiden may have made you strong but loving this man had made you stronger


End file.
